Waking early to face an empty day, with no interest in anything but your loss is to be expected. Grief takes many forms. If it not shown publicly, it will hit privately at unexpected times, triggered by the least expected stimulus.
You will ask, “Why?”
Holidays and “special” days can be deadly; and, if the weather is bad it is even worse.
People who speak in platitudes, know not of what they speak!* Time does NOT healing everything. It only makes it bearable. You cannot always be busy. You will be alone to face your loss. To hear “You’re so strong” over and over becomes intolerable.
People must be able to accept your need to leave at any time, even though you appear to be holding up well.
Although you need to talk about your loss, people may avoid you, because they can’t face the same thing for themselves. You MUST have someone to with whom to speak honestly.
Even though you used to think logically, you will become completely illogical for a while; and little things will seem to become insurmountable.
Those who tell you that they hope you will find someone else will anger you.
You will go on, why or how you don’t know; but the survival instinct does prevail.
The list goes on and on. This is just for insight into the emotions facing survivors.
From “Grief” Who Helps the Living? by Mary McLaughlin, R.N.
American Journal of Nursing, 1978.
** Personal Note: Do not feel you need to reply to ignorance.