After Chuck died, no matter how together I seemed, I really did not know what to do with myself that first year. In an instant, my life as I once knew it ceased to exist. Looking back if I hadn’t had to get up to run our business, I probably would’ve thrown a pity party for myself and gone into hiding for awhile. Instead, I trudged ahead and tripped myself up in an intricate variety of ways.
Please read on and try to do as I suggest, not as I did…
1. Stay in charge of your own life.
No one knows what you need better than you do! Do not let anyone manage your money or your personal affairs.
2. As best as you can, maintain your familiar routine.
You will make changes eventually. It happens. For now you don’t need the extra stress. Stick with what you know.
3. Make plans for weekends and those “special dates.”
Get out your calendar and fill those days with family, friends, or activities that will make these days easier to get through. If you don’t know where to go, or what to do, check out the calendar section of your newspaper, or go online. It’s a wonderful opportunity to catch up with those things you said you’d do like to do someday if you had the time. You now have the time!
4. Fight loneliness. Get out of the house, especially when you don’t want to.
Find something to do! Take a class, join a gym or a house of worship. Help children learn to read (my personal favorite) or reshelve books at the library. Give of yourself to someone else; or just go for a walk. I promise, both will make you feel much better!
5. Be good to yourself.
Treat yourself to tickets to something you’d really like to see.
Get a massage or a facial.
Buy yourself some flowers
Change your haircolor.
Don’t go into debt; but splurge every now and then on something special…
6. Reread the first five suggestions!
You are in charge of being good to yourself now. Nobody else will do it.
With my blessings and encouragement, go for it.